tOm@kO's life ~*_*~

have not been updating my blog for a very very long time.
just simply because i'm busy.

sometimes wonder whether it is worth it for all those hard work that i've done.
and to take up all those presure.
boss questioning why you did not do this and that.
what is the status of doing this and that.

and you have to settle the things you spend four months time to do it and now you have to spend one and a half months to finished it just simply because you need to let your client have sufficient time to review it and with the hope that there are no complains from the client.

i think the most important thing is you need to know what to do first and when you should do the thing fast.

i think that should be the way of doing things.

my boss always complain that i'm doing things very slowly.
however i think my speed is okay.
and my bf say i'm pempering my boss too much just by fufilling what she want.

all this month i'm trying my best to look for my balance.
how not to over worked myself.
how to live up to people's expectation.
try not to give empty promises.

a bit stress off...
but i think avoiding is not a good action...
and it's time for me to face the music.

work hard and work the something out.
after the break have to show that i'm able to perform
have to show that i'm better than before.
have to show i'm better than everyone else.

how to prove it?
work my axx out?
have to work at home eventough it's after work?
admit that i'm a bit lazy than before and have to try and boost myself up.
and wannt learn more and more in the future.

i do see my vision
and i do think that just talking doesnt make us any good.
just questioning what is correct and wrong is not enough.
just wasting a lot of time to discuss and questioning what you suppose to do and you never do it.
and also.
just wanna get myself on the move and...
hehe... will become the most efficient staff lo ;)

作词：李焯雄/陶吉吉 作曲：陶吉吉
碎石子路长青苔 指针把时间再扫开
马戏团走了但小丑还在 这舞台
黑马车没停下来 消失前你回过头来
多少人到现在还不明白 还等待
一直走一直走 一直不停的走 该选哪个路口
一瞬间一瞬间 可能这个瞬间 那命运就会改变

OLIA 请不要走 是否我做的还是不够
OLIA 请不要走 为什么永久不会永久 不停留

钟声把夕阳晕开 十八岁又换了一代
机会是否划一次的火柴 不重来
一直走一直走 一直不停的走 能不能再重头
一辈子一辈子 就算用一辈子 也没有办法挽回

OLIA 请不要走 是否我让你等得太久
OLIA 你早巳走 为什么失去才想保有 不放手

不放手 不放手
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
just got the new album of david tao from my bf and got it loaded in my pc. i think it would be annother of my favourite album.. and today i wanna share this song..
sound very very nice and relaxing :)

found this interesting story on my e-mail then wanna share it here

兩只蒼蠅

有一位朋友分享了一個有關兩只蒼蠅的故事。這個故事是這樣的……

古時候有個商人到遠方做買賣，用兩匹馬來拉貨物 c當去到了一個斜坡時，兩匹馬拉得很辛苦。

於是，就有兩只蒼蠅飛來了。

蒼蠅A說： "喂！那兩匹馬那麼辛苦，我們去幫幫它們吧！ "

然後，兩只蒼蠅便飛到那兩匹馬的耳朵旁、鼻子前，嗡嗡嗡嗡……

那兩匹馬因拉車辛苦，加之又有煩人的蒼蠅在飛來飛去，感到非常難受。最後，那兩匹馬終於爬上斜坡，這松了一口氣。

這時，兩只蒼蠅也松了一口氣的說：" 啊！你看，我們幫了他們忙，我們也辛苦了。"

其實，那兩匹馬就是形容我們這些任勞任怨的員工。而那兩只蒼蠅，就是我們的上司。

當我們已經忙到很痛苦的時候，我們的上司只會在我們身邊吵吵鬧鬧，不但沒減輕我們的負擔，反而嚴重影響我們工作的進度。最可惡的是，他們還會以為自己貢獻很多

I think it's true that sometimes the boss doesn't care how you do it.. they just want you to get the things done.
yeah they will always ask you to rush the things out.

sometimes it's a sad sad thing for me cos my client is leaving.
and some are leaving the company without informing us.
some they wanna have a change of environment.
for me, I'm just not confortable with the people in my group knowing what's my relationship with the client.
I do not like to use the relationship as a tool to achieve what I want but I just want to proof that I'm capable of handling the job myself and I'm able to make the decision of my own.

Maybe my client feel it's not so important to inform everyone that he/she is leaving, and the choice of leaving the company is up to them. It doesn't involve anyone else, however I do feel that it's a curtesy that you inform other people you are leaving so that they know how else they should contact with since you are leaving.

I feel that it's not responsible to say that the thing is not urgent and you would not like to attend to it now and the new comer would be able to attend to it.
I do feel a bit upset with the mentality of those poeple.

Having to handle this situation since early of this year starting with A company, I think I've gotten used to being able to handle it because people have their own choice in the life and they can choose their life path. and what we can do it's just say all the best.

I do think I'm a bit upset by things this few days and i think i should have a rest by now.
Take a break and let things go smooth.

erm.. my client suddenly e-mail us to inform us that they wanna pay us a courtesy visit.
and the date he choosed is the date right after our filing deadline.

and I have not inform him that the client that my boss actually resuffle the portfolio and I'm no longer in charge of the accounts.

I think one of the biggest weekness of me is not being able to say no to my client.
and I think when everyone say okay.. then you have to learn how to say okay as well rite?

today it seems like a very very messy day for me..
it's like a war.
yeah the filing deadline is nearer and nearer.
and we have to take up all the ad-hoc job and starting to teach the junior to do things.

wonder what will happened.
everyone is long for a long long break.
everything should be ending
hoping it will end soon.
and the begining will come real soon as well.

continue regarding my post for the resign virus.

my client resigned from their company. most of the staff resigned because they cannot 'tahan' the boss and also maybe because they want to change to a better working environment.

and annother client who replace the staff temporary, have to go back to thier own /old position.
and i have client who always ask me to go to thier place and they would 'belanja' me

feel abit sad la...
maybe this is the season of staff turn around.
and the company have to pass the season and look for better staff and go trough the hardship for the moment.

sometimes it's a bit difficult to deal with new staff
because they are alien to you.
but if you are friendly to them and give your full co-operation to them
they would give you the same assistant.

earlier this week,
my senior tender.. then followed by my junior

my senior just joined us for about three month and my junior joined us for about three weeks.

strees is a bad virus and it result to other poeple wanted to resign from their current post.
sometimes other poeple have very lame excuse saying they like the job but cannot cope with the presure.
and sometimes i wonder isn't their choice in the first place to join the company to get more exposure and face more challenge ma...
then now why they wanna give up.

i really cannot understand.
but i do strongly believe that poeple have their own choice in live and nobody can influence one's decision.

i know my senior is very adenment to leave us
i just feel a bit kasian since we have a very very strong team for this round filling and things went better than expected.

as for my junior and she is just fresh and just join the new working world apart from studying and studying previously.
i do think that it should be a bit weird for me to conclude that since she like tax so much she should not just leave the job and ...
and my boss think that it is not a responsible act.

everyone in the office is stressed off except me?

why because their cases are bigger than mine
because i have the sense of urgency?
but i know the way i do my tax computation sucks.
and i produce the tax computation in a very not timely manner.

everyone is soooooooooooooooooooooooo stress off.
i need to take care of everyone's feeling.
cannot be joking all the way.

i do hope things are running well.
i know you want to bomb your boss with good results.
but sometimes things cannot be rushed.

sometimes i just feel that it's not right to rush things out in all of the sudden lo...
sometimes i wonder what's my purpose of leaving such a stressful life.
others they can enjoy things around them.
while me keep being complaint
you should not be on the phone with the client for such a long time.

i found the solution not to talk on the phone with the client for very long time.
that is to e-mail client.

sometimes i think client need your immediate attention and what you should do is not just ignore what they want.
i know sometimes we have to 'berdikari'
however most of the time i think the importance of 'tolong-menolong' should be made know among each other.

a little stress of...
a little piss off...

wonder why treating other poeple nice and they would not appreciate it.

consider my action recently a bit too over.
consider myself a bit out of control
consider myself a bit too stress off.

what to do?
working for about 18 hours a day.
and what you get in return is your boss telling you,
why this and that not done?

why you so slow?
altough i told you give me by this date...
but you can give it to me earlier if possible.

what do you know your requirement are a bit just too out of the world?
do you know it's just a bit too much?

I tell myself my motivation to work is holiday.
I don't care after working for this filing I would like to go on holiday.

that is my purpose.
why? do you think that the relationship between group member should not be good?
talking among group member is prohibited?

talking with client also prohibited?
relationship with client have to be built up.
knowing the politic in the client's company
knowing how things runs in the client's company.

admit that i might not be handling things as good as you are able to.
but i'm learning to handle it.
wonder why you say cannot talk to the financial controller while the financial controller is the person who can give me all the information i needed to complete my assignment.

no joking during work...
i think you are just a little bit stress off and
a little bit pissed off...

i think you need a break!!!!!!

about three to four months ago, i was talking about taking exam in my company...
now after months and months of waiting, the results are finally out.

erm... i got the best result among those who are taking the exam.
yeah... i scored 82 average for the basic tax examination held in my company.
top scorrer... yeah!!!

but i think i was under presured since my ATM was previously one of the top scorrer during her time as a junior.
and my STM also 'inform' me that i should perform very well in my exam cos the staff under her never fail to perform well in the company's internal tax examination.

wow.. dispite all the presure.. i think i did not did very well, in the sense that i should continuously update myself with the tax knowledge.
and should be able to answer the client's question since it's a tax consultant's responsibility to be able to answer to their question.
erm... hoping for a better future la...

half of year 2006 has finished.
and there is annother half to go before the year end.

and now i guess should be my half-yearly review for this year.
nothing much had been done.
and i started to feel i'm slowing down.

now i wanted to gain some momentum when i work.
and want to try to grab as many as possible from my client and my senior.

now i start to learn tax again.
try to look at the acca past year question.
wonder whether i could be able to teach tax in the near future.
wanted to gain the momentum.
wanted to have the sharp sense... in terms of tax and when being questioned by client i would be able to answer their question.

the following are my plan to be executed during the year:-

1) improve my tax knowledge
2) to be able to drive to work by end of this year
3) to reduce weight by end of the year
4) to really tidy up my room and give it a brand new feel by the end of the year.
5) to have a week's holiday in Malaysia and relax myself
6) to keep in touch with poeple - friends from secondary, college and etc
7) to concern about my family member more
8) to get a double promotion next year
9) to pempered myself nicely!!!!!!
10) of course keep on blogging!!!!

sometimes i'm wonder why people are so afraid to deal with higher level management.

sometimes we deal with poeple like the company's accountant and sometimes just the accounts staff.

sometimes we would just prefer to deal with poeple who do not have autority and just following order.

but i do think that we need to deal with those poeple who have more authority, like financial controller or group accountant?

they are the poeple overseeing the company's financial position and they should be the poeple who are in a better position to comment about what i required from them?

sometimes i wonder why i so not taking care of myself.
and wonder why i did not give 100% of my life.

wonder what is good and what is not in my life.
wonder what should be my next step.

life is boring.
after you finished your studies..
get a good job...
after getting a good job...
started to think of get a car a house...
and at the same time getting a suitable partner...
and years after that...
you settle down and you get married...
and you have kids...

it sound so damn boring to me..
cant life be a bit more intersting?
even you can have a break form anything you want to runaway...
you have to come back to the realty of life.
that's you need to worry about money, your career, your parents, your family, your friends...

wonder whether there is anything exciting in my life that is going to happen real soon...
i'm not 18 or 22 anymore...
have to start to plan what i want i my life and
plan to settle down...(maybe i do not want to settle down?)

Sometimes i wonder why my boss complain me,
saying that I talk a lot and this made my work very slack.

and i answer her very c2pidly? i suppose...
haha why? cos i told her last time there is nobody to talk with.
yeah that's the fact.
actually i feel that i'm a very outgoing and talkative person..
and i know who to mix with and who not to mix with la..

know the limit.
learning how to speak well with other poeple.

Comparing an apple with an apple and an orange with an orange.

I wonder why people in this world always like to compare.
and thier comparison is not based on a fair basis.

why our group's people go back so late?
why we need to work so hard.

I enjoy the satisfaction of being able to finished the job earlier.
I think that's not fair to say that we stay back late is because we are not efficient.

I'm a little bit hurt leh..
huh ;O

I'm sorry I don't know who this number belongs to...
I'm sorry I don't know i don't have your number.

'bai tuo' I'm using the number for more than 5 years d.
and yet you are telling me you do not have my number...???

I guess I know what's the reason of not getting your birthday wish this year.
first of all... you forgot...
and secondly.. you don't have my number..
what a fake and lame excuse...

but anyway, what is pass is pass...
i think i would be looking forward for things such as...
who is treating me better rather than..
looking backwards for something which does not belongs to me.

yeah people like to compare.
yeah they always do.
but when there is not a valid reason for the complain.
and there is not worthwhile to make a complain.

have not really updated my blog recently.
have not really write about what i see and what i feel recently.

i do not know whether i'm really stressed out or my performance just going down.
i really need a break from what i'm doing now.
maybe a short break will do.
a nice and short one.

i wonder whether my boss would approve my leave.
verbally she say yes because i had been working very very hard

actually the reason behind myself working very hard is not because i'm really that hard working
actually is just because i hate to get compared with other poeple.
and it's very irritating that you got compared with someone else.
apple should be compared against apple and not orange.

sometimes i feel so unfair that you compare an apple with an orange.
but i still do not know how to express my dissatisfaction.

Day 1 after moving into the new office. I've yet to tidy all the files and stuffs... and I would post somemore new picture regarding my new office in the future... my new work station does not look like this now... it's even messier and I've put up a big planner targeting what should i do within this few months.

my old office place.. it's consider not as messy as before since i've moved most of the things to the new office place by the time i took this picture.